This special Fest Edition is dedicated with love and friendship to our New York contingent of the OBSSE. Now, more than ever, it seems important to celebrate the support, kindness, wit, and countless hours of laughter we've enjoyed in our on-line community. Some of us were fortunate enough to experience this same comeradeship face to face this summer, in Winter Park, Colorado and that's what this newsletter is all about. You won't find any heady or profound articles on globalization and world peace here, but you will find amusing recollections of all the absurd, nonsensical mini-events that seem to occur when more than two or three are gathered in She-Who-Used-to-Wear-Good-Pantsuits' Name. We hope it brings a smile to your face.
"It's something unpredictable
E D I T O R S
D E S I G N & G R A P H I C S
C O L U M N I S T S
C O N T R I B U T O R S t o No. 41
Michele aka Griot
Thanks to Haven and GAWS for
To tell you the truth this is the second time I've written this article. We had been shooting to get this newsletter out initially in mid September. Of course, at that point it was already going to be terribly late, but it had been a leisurely summer here at the Abbey. We'd had another fabulous FEST and the chance to enjoy this community once again in person, and we were just getting around to putting out our much anticipated FEST edition chronicling the event.
Well, as we all know, all hell broke loose in the world. I learned even more about this community as we on the OBSSE mailing list searched for any news of our DC and NY brothers and sisters. We breathed a sigh of relief every time someone checked in shaken but still with us. We waited for reports from our own dr. sandy working in an ER room close to the scene. We heard from our friends overseas expressing their condolences. We've got at least one member taking Cipro because of possible Anthrax exposure. Luckily, we did not lose any of our members, but it became clear just how far reaching the OBSSE family was.
With all this going on it became very hard to be funny for us here at News for the OBSSEsed. I've never worked on a harder edition of this newsletter. Just finding the motivation to turn to this task instead of sitting an watching the regular day's news of yet another day of "all Anthrax all the time" was difficult.
However, since we have now had our fill of going about our day and yet being extra superduper extremely highest alert vigilant we're all back now. And we are trying to get this "Summer Edition" out before the start of season nine.
I'm hoping that a little frivolity will be a tonic. That remembering the wonderful time we had together at FEST will make folks smile. We're trying to convince ourselves that another season of just focusing on the CHarc will get us through whatever manner of stupid writing, whale sounds, pop tarts, and butt genies gets tossed our way.
While we are still planning to continue the News for the OBSSEsed, we suspect our operations this year will be as scaled back as Gillian's involvement. On those months that the newsletter does not come back just think of it as your absent center. At least you'll see it more often than Mulder.
Thanks for reading us.
|Scully Marathons Break $60,000
We're done with all the counting from our amazingly successful marathons, and our grand total stands at $60,877.10 raised for NF organizations worldwide. Over $50,000 of that has been delivered to NF, Inc. here in the United States. There are actually a few of the highly stylish marathon shirts left (mostly in size XL), so if you'd still like one you can send an email to marathonshirt.
We've actually just completed voting on next year's marathon line up and hope to see you all again next May as this even continues to get bigger and better every year!
THE START OF SOMETHING NEW!
As is usually the case, I got talked into holding another gathering next year. This one, is however going to be very different from FESTs in the past. It is only going to be open to the members of the OBSSE mailing list and it will not be organized in the same spreadsheet overdrive fashion of previous FESTs. In other words I'll let people know the when and the where, suggest a meeting place and time and the rest is up to them. I won't be collecting fees, planning events, arranging meals or anything. The fun will be up to you to find, and I have all the faith in the world that you'll be able to. Viva FEST Vegas will be a laid back event. For those of you who haven't been to Vegas lately there is something to do for members of all ages. Me, you'll find at the craps table or sipping Scullyritas at the Border Grill. Feel free to join me for a drink or a roll of the dice. Or perhaps a whirl through the Star Trek Experience. Rumor has it you will find Paula and Sister Beer at the Wayne Newton Theater.
NO SPREADSHEETS. NO MEALS.
Did You Hear the One About the 35 Virgins?
by Sister Autumn
It was a few months before FEST, and already the event was shaping up to be a little different from those past. Sure, we always have had FEST virgins - I mean not everyone is cut out to be a FEST Ho like myself - but this year was different. FEST was going to be literally crawling with FEST virgins. Teaming with them. We'd always humiliated them in the past. Last year's whistle blowing at registration with yells of "FEST VIRGIN!" was a nice start, but this is the OBSSE. That means every year has to be bigger and better. Because as we like to say, "if it is worth doing, it is worth overdoing."
So, I was out having margaritas one night with the planning committee (imagine that) and our own Sister Vivien a FEST virgin herself pipes up with the rita-induced idea of auctioning off the FEST virgins to the experienced FESTers to be their minion for all of FEST. Now, being a politically correct group, we decided that just could not happen. I mean what if a FEST virgin's feelings got hurt because the bid did not go high enough. Nope, we could never just auction off fellow brothers and sisters, but we could sure as hell raffle them off!
So, an idea was hatched. Sisters Bryn and Scooby stepped up to the plate and designed obnoxious and large buttons that proclaimed the wearer a FEST VIRGIN that our new friends were handed at registration and told they must wear the whole time. That made it extra fun since a few were asked by the unsuspecting vacationers at the Iron Horse Resort where we stayed just exactly what Virgin FEST was.
At registration all experienced FESTers were given raffle tickets and at our opening dinner the games began. One by one the names of all the FEST Virgins were put on the block and raffle tickets were drawn to see just whose FEST minion they were. Some trades were made. Some virgins got off lucky and got a kind mentor. Others got Chickie. The Elders who were oddly minionless just hung signs outside on their balcony like "Elders Need Beer" and waited for an experienced FESTer to put their minion to good use. That worked very well for us I might add. I still have FEST beer in my fridge. It all went very smoothly except for when that uppity little "I'm a Big Boy" virgin Brother Scott was given power (what the hell were we thinking) and banned the word minion. We adapted though. We're a clever lot.
At the end of it all we welcomed the virgins into the glory that is FEST, and managed to get waited on at the same time. Win. Win.
In keeping with the grand tradition started with the very first FEST, lucky attendees left Winter Park with a number of mementos of their stay. A big thanks to DSW shoes, specifically their Denver location for generously donating canvas bags for the event.
Of course we needed something to put in those bags. In addition to the regular local guides for Colorado and the Winter Park area (far be it for us to have a FEST without roadmaps!) we also had the following great goodies:
» Latex gloves to snap on.
» Tic Tacs
» Chocolate cigars celebrating the May 20, 2001 birth of William Sculder
» The FEST '01 Official Guide and Handbook generously printed by our own Sister Scooby and featuring hilarious ads from the Abbey.
» OBSSE royal blue golf shirts with our web address embroidered on. (These did make it handy for pretending to curious onlookers that we were a failed dot com burning through our last venture capital with a big party
» Lariat Car Rental bumper stickers that were replicas of those on the show
» OBSSE logo golf balls for our miniature golf extravaganza
» The 2001 Scully Marathon Soundtrack CD created and supplied by the lovely and talented Betsy Dodd
» Official OBSSE Cheese Tour 2001 pennants to terrorize Sister Beer with